predencia

Conflicting wishes cannot be my will.

Father, Your Will is mine, and only that. There is no other will for me to have. Let me not try to make another will, for it is senseless and will cause me pain. Your Will alone can bring me happiness, and only Your exists. If I would have what only You can give, I must accept Your Will for me, and enter into peace where conflict is impossible, Your Son is one with You in being and in will, and nothing contradicts the holy truth that I remain as You created me.

And with this prayer we enter silently into a state where conflict cannot come, because we join our holy will with God’s, in recognition that they are the same.

I surrendered totally to the will of the day. It began with my artist’s date to the museum and art gallery to see the Birmingham, Its People, Its History. A fascinating interactive exhibition where I learned much, including that there was a club in Erdington called Mother’s where Pink Floyd recorded a live album!! I’ve never seen the Military Service Act 1916, never really understood what called men to sign up. Would it work today? It’s a great exhibition if you have children.

Birmingham is being prepared for the German morning, the Christmas trees have arrived. It was a sharp contrast to the demonstration against violence in India.

I shared a new poem with the Writers Without Borders members before going to meet with a videographer who filmed Caribbean Juices. I think I’ll get a couple of good pieces out of it.

Where darkness was I look upon the light.

Father, our eyes are open at last. Your holy world awaits us, as our sight is finally restored and we can see. We thought we suffered. But we had forgot the Son whom You created. Now we see that darkness is our own imagining, and light is there for us to look upon. Christ’s vision changes darkness into light, for fear must disappear when love has come. Let me forgive Your holy world today, that I may look upon its holiness and understand it but reflects my own.

Our love awaits us as we go to Him, and walks beside us showing us the way. He fails in nothing. He the End we seek, and He the Means by which we go to Him.

The light I looked upon today was the array of characters that scrambled for their story to be told, virtually tripping over each other, pushing and shoving, elbowing each other out of the way rather than wait quietly to be called. It was as though they’d waiting for me for years, and now that I’d arrived they wanted to make sure I got everything right.

After writing myself a job description, person specification and remuneration package this morning, I began the task of plotting and structuring the new book. Everything is falling into place really easily. I’m looking forward to spending more time with them tomorrow.

And there a reminder in the lesson. He fails in nothing.

The gift of Christ is all I seek today.

What but Christ’s vision would I use today, when it can offer me a day in which I see a world so like to Heaven that and ancient memory returns to me? Today I can forget the world I made. Today I can get past all fear, and be restored to love and holiness and peace. Today I am redeemed, and born anew into a world of mercy and of care; of loving kindness and of peace of God.

And so, our Father, we return to You, remembering we never went away; remembering Your holy gifts to us. In gratitude and thankfulness we come, with empty hands and open hearts and minds, asking but what You give. We cannot make an offering sufficient for Your Son. But in Your Love the gift of Christ is his.

Awake in the twilight hours (4 a.m.) with a head full of things that needed to go on paper. My journaling, and this lesson reminded me of how much I have to be grateful for. My journaling also made me see that I am still playing small, and helped me to see why I’m manifesting small in my life, including people who are afraid of me getting big – only because I’m afraid of getting big. Well NO MORE. As soon as I’ve finished the next two books I’m ready.

Speaking of which. I am on a roll with what I’m calling the ‘church’ book. I’m bang on target with 2000 words a day, even though most of those were written over two days. My, these characters are insistent.

I made a decision to deal with a lot of little jobs today, because I realised that they were taking up creative space. It seems to have worked – I’m on a proper roll.

There is a peace that Christ bestows on us.

Who uses but Christ’s vision finds a peace so deep and quiet, undisturbable and wholly changeless, that the world contains no counterpart. Comparisons are still before this peace. And all the world departs in silence as this peace envelops it, and gently carries it to truth, no more to be the home of fear. For love has come, and healed the world by giving it Christ’s peace.

Father, the peace of Christ is given us, because it is Your Will that we be saved. Help us today but to accept Your gift, and judge it not. For it has come to us to save us from our judgement on ourselves.

I really struggled to find my peace today. I was still unsettled by the interactions of yesterday, still looking for a way to do the best for both of us. In the end, after much analysis, I handed it over to the Holy Spirit, admitting that my best analysis had brought me to this point.

Although I did a lot of research, I only managed one paragraph on the new book. My head was full, and the couple whose story I was due to write today said they needed my full attention.

I called it a day quite early with a bottle of Sauvignon Blanc and a sting of comedy shows. Sometimes you just have to admit it’s not going to happen and have a laugh.

Let not my world obscure the sight of Christ.

I can obscure my holy sight, if I intrude my world upon it. Nor can I behold the holy sights Christ looks upon, unless it is His vision that I use. Perception is a mirror, not a fact. And what I look on is my state of mind, reflected outward. I would bless the world by looking on it through the eyes of Christ. And I will look upon the certain signs that all my sins have been forgiven me.

You lead me from the darkness to the light; from sin to holiness. Let me forgive, and thus receive salvation for the world. It is Your gift, my Father, given me to offer to Your holy Son, that he may find again the memory of You, and of Your Son as You created him.

Finished the first story by 12.30 today (5500 words) and felt ecstatic, and probably would have continued on a high except for the visit I had from someone who was very upset with me. The encounter was a really clear example of the lesson – perception is a mirror, not a fact. When we’ve made up stories in our heads, and projected those stories on others, we see only what we want to see, hear only what supports our projections, and forgive only what we think the other person deserves to be forgiven for. Being on the receiving end of such projections I came to realise that it didn’t really matter what I said. Any attempt to defend myself was seen as evidence that I had something to defend, so I remembered and reverted quickly to one of my ‘get out of jail’ affirmations – in my defencelessness my safety lies.

It was also clear evidence that you cannot change a person’s perception until s/he is willing to have it changed. I was very sad for the person, because I could feel his pain, but as he was determined to hang on to it (at least for the time being) there was nothing I could do but send him love. But it left me feeling very sad.

The holy Christ is born in me today.

Watch with me, angels, watch with me today. Let all God’s holy Thoughts surround me, and be still with me while Heaven’s Son is born. Let earthly sounds be quiet, and the sights to which I am accustomed disappear. Let Christ be welcomed where He is at home. And let Him hear the sounds He understands, and see but sights that show His Father’s Love. Let him no longer be a stranger here, for He is born again in me today.

Your Son is welcome, Father. He has come to save me from the evil self I made. He is the Self that You have given me. He is but what I really am in truth. He is the Son You love above all things. He is my Self as you created me.

OK, so my first set of couples for the new book were singing like song birds today, desperate for me to tell their story, 3500 words poured out today. This feels very right.

What is the Second Coming? (Reading)

Christ’s Second Coming, which is sure as God, is merely the correction of mistakes. It is a part of the condition that restores the never lost, and re-establishes what is forever and forever true. It is the invitation to God’s Word to take illusions place; the willingness to let forgiveness rest upon all things without exception and without reserve. The Second Coming is the one event in time which time itself can not affect.

Lesson 301

And God Himself shall wipe away tears. (Lesson)

Father, unless I judge I cannot weep. Nor can I suffer pain, or feel I am abandoned or unneeded in the world. This is my home because I judge it not, and therefore is it only what You will. Let me today behold it uncondemned, through happy eyes forgiveness has released from all distortion. Let me see Your world instead of mine. And all the tears I shed will be forgotten, for their source is gone. Father, I will not judge Your world today.

God’s world is happy. Those who look on it can only add their joy to it, and bless it as a cause of further joy in them. We wept because we did not understand. But we have learned the world we saw was false, and we will look upon God’s world today.

Most of the day I spent mulling over how to structure the new book. I talked to a friend who gave me a few suggestions and a lot of encouragement. I feel VERY, VERY, EXCITED. More than I’ve done in a long time. I spent a lot of time clearing my space ready to begin my new assignment tomorrow.

Went to The Club, The Spa in The Cube last night on a Groupon voucher….what a lovely place. I felt completely relaxed and ravenous after.